Last of the Questions

As part of my Day Zero Project, I am answering “50 Questions to Free Your Mind” (Google it).   I had originally thought to do these in my personal journal, but then I thought, why not put them on my blog.  So get ready for some rambling answers.  Don’t say I didn’t warn you… Here's my post for questions #1-5.  And here for questions #6-10.  And here for questions #11-20. And here for questions #21-26.  And here for questions #27-34.  And here for questions #35-41.

42. Would you be willing to reduce your life expectancy by 10 years to become extremely attractive or famous? 

No.  Being attractive or famous would not necessarily increase my quality of life.  I would rather have those ten year to increase my quality of life and enjoy life.  We have to strive to be happy in our lives the way they are.  We can aspire to change things, but obviously certain things are out of our control.  Having a fairy tale fantasy doesn't help focus on your current life.  I want to think about every day as a chance to enjoy life.  Better to back to enjoying it...

43. What is the difference between beling alive and truly living? 

Wow.  I didn't read this question before writing the previous answer.  I think it goes back to the idea of striving for better life every day and being complacent.

44. When is it time to stop calculating risk and rewards, and just go ahead and do what you know is right?

Now.  Too much time hemming and hawing gets you nowhere.  You don't get rewards or punishments not trying.  Instead you only become stagnant.  Get up and do something now.

45. If we learn from our mistakes, why are we always so afraid to make a mistake?

Uncertainty is always scary.  We are afraid to make a mistake because it is a mistake.  Instead, we should think of mistakes are learning tools.

46. What would you do differently if you knew nobody would judge you?

Dance and sing in the streets.  Wear whatever I happen to throw on in the morning (I have certain clothing rules).  Say what's on my mind.

47. When was the last time you notied the sound of your own breathing?

Last night while trying to fall asleep.  This cough has created some breathing issues especially at night.  The sound was a bit more of a wheezing than regular breathing.

48. What do you love?  Have any of your recent actions openly expressed this love?

My boys, J, reading, swimming pools, sunshine...  I think so.

49. In 5 years from now, will you remember what you did yesterday?  What about the day before that?  Or the day before that?

No.  I try to keep a good recollection of daily events, but many days fall into a pretty regular routine.  Neuroscientists know that our memories like the unusual.  We tend to remember big impact events (good or bad).  Waking up, eating, showering, going to work, etc, bed time is a routine but not very memorable.

50. Decisions are being made right now.  The question is: Are you making them for yourself, or are you letting others make them for you?

I like to think I am making decisions, but I also have considerations of other people dependent or directly connected to me.  No person makes a decision completely on their own.

Spilling my guts...

As part of my Day Zero Project, I am answering “50 Questions to Free Your Mind” (Google it).   I had originally thought to do these in my personal journal, but then I thought, why not put them on my blog.  So get ready for some rambling answers.  Don’t say I didn’t warn you… Here's my post for questions #1-5.  And here for questions #6-10.  And here for questions #11-20. And here for questions #21-26.  And here for questions #27-34.

35. Why do religions that support love cause so many wars?

Misconstrued need to be included.  Many religions have a "us" or "them" mentality that taken to extremes can lead to war.  Instead of a love and understanding approach they take a militant convert everyone approach.

36. Is it possible to know, without a doubt, what is good and what is evil?

No.  Society collectively decides what is good and what is evil.  We generally adhere the standards, but of course there are those that deviate.  Thus, we have a societal system of promoting what is good and punishing those do what is evil.

37. If you just won a million dollars, would you quit your job?

Considering that right now I'm unemployed, this doesn't really apply.  Yet, let me answer as if I had a job.  No I would not quit my job.  First of all a million dollars really isn't that much.  It could make life easier temproarily.  It could pay off debts/mortgages/loans.  If could provide some instant entertainment.  It could pay for future endeavors.  But a million dollars isn't going to make you life-long no worries rich. Secondly, I have gotten super bored when not working.  I need something to occupy my time daily and help organize my life.  Left to my own devices, I blog and surf the web for hours a day.  (I'm actually working of two projects that could pay me for doing just that.)

38. Would you rather have less work to do, or more work you actually enjoy doing?

More work that I enjoy doing.  I never minded the long hours of teaching as long as I was getting something out of it.

39. Do you feel like you've lived this day a hundred times before?

Yep.  Reading, housework, blogging, surfing, eating...  This is my life currently.

40. When was the last time you marched into the dark with only the soft glow of an idea you strongly beleived in?

Never?  I just don't think I've ever really marched into the dark, the twilight maybe, the sunset definitely.  I think I would like to jump into the unknown with passion, but at the same time, I am a big scaredy cat.

41. If you knew that everyone you know was going to die tomorrow, who would you visit today?

My children.  Although it would take most of the day to get there (damn non direct flights!)

Some personal time...

As part of my Day Zero Project, I am answering “50 Questions to Free Your Mind” (Google it).   I had originally thought to do these in my personal journal, but then I thought, why not put them on my blog.  So get ready for some rambling answers.  Don’t say I didn’t warn you… Here's my post for questions #1-5.  And here for questions #6-10.  And here for questions #11-20. And here for questions #21-26.

27. Is it possible to know the truth without challenging it first?

No.  I meet way too many people that accept anything and everything without question.  Those people scare me.  They allow the status quo to continue without improvement.  Question everything.

28. Has your greatest fear ever come true?

Yes.  Although things have been improving.

29. Do you remember that time 5 years ago when you were extremely upset?  Does it really matter now?

No.  I don't remember.  2007 was a pretty decent year, nothing too bad happened.  Since then, there have been a few angry times that I still remember and are still a bit upset about.

30. What is your happiest childhood memory?  What makes it so special?

Probably Christmas Eves.  I love Christmas time full of lights, snow, presents, and awesome food.  I'm really looking forward to this Christmas.

31. At what time in your recent pas have you felt most passionate and alive?

I would have to say my time teaching.  I loved it, but man it was ton of work for little pay.  I can't afford to regret my decisions, but I really do miss it.

32.  If not now, then when?

Hopefully the coming months will hold some great and passionate times.

33. If you haven't achieved it yet, what do you have to lose?

34. Have you ever been with someone, said nothing, and walked away feeling like you just had the best conversation ever?

Many many times.  I love having those psychic-like connections with people.  It is an amazing feeling of connection with fellow humans.

50 Questions - Part 4

As part of my Day Zero Project, I am answering “50 Questions to Free Your Mind” (Google it).   I had originally thought to do these in my personal journal, but then I thought, why not put them on my blog.  So get ready for some rambling answers.  Don’t say I didn’t warn you… Here's my post for questions #1-5.  And here for questions #6-10.  And here for questions #11-20.

21. Would you rather be a worried genius or a joyful simpleton? Worried genius.  I like my education way too much to be a joyful simpleton.  Life is nothing without education.

22. Why are you, you? Nature and nurture.  There's the psychologist in my coming out.  My genes make up part of me.  My life experiences make up the other part.  To be more detailed, I would have to tell my life story, and that's a pretty long story.

23. Have you been the kind of friend you want as a friend? Yes and no.  I think I have overall been a good friend to people.  There have been instances that I wish I had put more effort into my friendships.  But all I can do now is try harder in the future.

24. Which is worse, when a good friend moves away, or losing touch with a good friend who lives right near you? Losing touch with a nearby friend.  Staying in touch across miles takes time and effort, and sometimes you lose friends.  It's not necessarily a horrible, world stopping thing.  It just is.  But losing the friend down the street means something happened.  People got lazy.  People drifted apart.  People betrayed each other.  Whatever it was, it was probably bad and that's the sad part.

25. What are you most grateful for? My health.  I know that many parents would answer: my children.  But without my health, I would not be able to function, let alone live life to the fullest.  I would not be able to enjoy the time with my children, and friends, and family.  I would be preoccupied by my health.  So I am grateful to be alive and healthy.

26. Would you rather lose all of your old memories, or never be able to make new ones? As much as a treasure old memories, I would lose them to gain new ones.  I am determined to look toward the future more.

Questions Questions

As part of my Day Zero Project, I am answering “50 Questions to Free Your Mind” (Google it).   I had originally thought to do these in my personal journal, but then I thought, why not put them on my blog.  So get ready for some rambling answers.  Don’t say I didn’t warn you… Here's my post for questions #1-5.  And here for questions #6-10.

11. You're having lunch with three people you respect and admire.  They all start criticizing a close friend of yours, not knowing she is your friend.  The criticism is distasteful and unjustified.  What do you do? Speak up.  I'm not sure why people feel the need to be negative all the time.  I know that I need to work on this and I think everyone else also needs to focus on this.  Since working in customer service, I've noticed how negative people are to total strangers.   I can't imagine how negative they are around so-called "friends."   

12. If you could offer a newborn child only one piece of advice, what would it be? Don't let people talk down to you or put you down in any way.  I spent too much time in my life feeling like there was something wrong with me.  It all goes back to kindness...

13. Would you break the law to save a loved one? Yes.  While I believe that the law is very important to our society, human life is even more important. 

14. Have you ever seen insanity where later saw creativity? Yes.  In teaching, we often view others' ideas and techniques with suspicion.  Only later does it become apparent that some of those weird ideas and techniques were pure genius!

15. What's something you know you do differently than most people? Lately, I've been getting the feeling that I think about and consider others more than most people I know or meet.  I'm not saying that I am in any way an awesome person, but I try to be polite and courteous most of the time. 

16. How come things that make you happy don't make everyone happy? Because we all unique beings.  I know, such a clichéd answer, but it's true.  Each one of us responds postively to different things.  I love a good book, a hot cup of tea, and a dark chocolate bar.  Not everyone finds so much satisfaction in those things.  That is what makes humans so interesting.

17. What one thing have you not done that you really want to do?  What's holding you back? Travel... time and money.  Up until now, I've had a ton of constraints on my time.  In reality, I still do, but some of the current commitments are more flexible.  And up until now, and still now really, I'm fairly poor.  I would love to have the time and money to travel all over the world.  As it stands, I have limitations.  But I'm really pushing for an out-of-state vacation within the next year.  It doesn't even have to be out of the country, I'd be okay just getting out of Nebraska (and not back to Indiana).

18. Are you holding onto something you need to let go of? Yes.  Anger.  I still have some anger about things from my past.  I am working to let go.  I've been working for years to let go.  I still have some to go.  It's an ongoing process.

19. If you had to move to a state or country beside the one you currently live in, where would you move and why? Somewhere warmer.  I like snow, I really do.  It's beautiful and fun to play in.  But then the bitter cold sets in and I get sick.  And suddenly winter isn't fun anymore.  I would love to move somewhere southern.  (But then I would have to deal with extreme heat and humidity...  blah!)  How about Hawaii?

20. Do you push the elevator button more than once?  Do you really believe it makes the elevator faster? No, but I see people do it all the time.  I really want to smack them...  Does that make me a horrible person?

More Random Answers...

As part of my Day Zero Project, I am answering “50 Questions to Free Your Mind” (Google it).   I had originally thought to do these in my personal journal, but then I thought, why not put them on my blog.  So get ready for some rambling answers.  Don’t say I didn’t warn you… Here's my post for questions #1-5.

6. If happiness was the national currency, what kind of work would make you rich?

Teaching, hands down.  I loved my time teaching, but found there were many obstacles.  The biggest one was the money.  Funny fact, I just realized today that I make the same amount as a receptionist as I did teaching.  That's sad.  I went to college for teaching.  I spent upwards of 50 hours a week teaching.  I put my blood, sweat, and tears into that job and I barely got by.  Despite that, I loved my time teaching.  People keep asking me if I'm going to get make into it and I am really uncertain at this stage.  Do I want to spend more time and money switching my license and then possibly getting paid barely enough to live?  It's such a tough decision...

7. Are you doing what you believe in, or are you settling for what you are doing?

What a follow-up question.  Based off of my answer to #6, I am completely settling right now.  I like my job.  I believe in what the organization is trying to do.  But my contribution is very small.  I would love to be doing more to help children and families. 

8. If the average human life span was 40 years, how would you live your life differently?

I would have made the move (physical and emotional) much earlier.  About 18 months ago, I made a major decision that has changed the course of my life for the better.  I am very excited about this new direction.  But what I really wish is that I figured my life out a little earlier.  Maybe I could have saved myself a lot of heartache. 

9. To what degree have you actually controlled the course your life has taken?

Such a tough question.  I really don't know how to answer this one.  At times i feel very much in control of my life and then at other times I feel complete helpless.  Does this question really give us any idea of big life events?  I am still trying to figure that out.

10. Are you more worried about doing things right, or doing the right things?

Doing the right things.  The outcomes are my focus right now.  I am trying to make decisions that will have positive outcomes and effects.  Unfortunately those outcomes are slated for the future.  I won't be able to see the effects for awhile now, I just have to keep faith. 

In Which I Share Some Personal Thoughts...

As part of my Day Zero Project, I am answering "50 Questions to Free Your Mind" (Google it).   I had originally thought to do these in my personal journal, but then I thought, why not put them on my blog.  So get ready for some rambling answers.  Don't say I didn't warn you...

1. How old would you be if you didn't know how old you are?

18.  (I'm 29 really.)  In many ways I still feel like a kid (maybe that's a good thing).  I don't feel overly worked or tired.  But I also don't feel like I'm a grown-up with a grown-up life.  I'm still figuring out what i want to be when I grow up.  I was a teacher and loved it, but don't know if that's my career path.  I still want to have more kids and possibly get married.  I don't get the settled feeling that I associate with being older.  Maybe this is what being an adult feels like, but I just feel really young. 

2. Which is worse, failing or never trying?

The teacher in me is screaming "never trying." And overall, that would be my answer.  But here's the thing... I'm always scared to try.  I am a really shy person.  I have a hard time putting myself out there.  So sometimes I make excuses to myself to not try.  And I know I will end up regretting things unless I get out there.  That first step is really hard.

3. If life is so short, why do we do so many things we don't like and like so many things we don't do?

Often we have a very warped sense of priorities.  We let certain things rule our life.  I've met people so focused on their job (even though they hate it) that they miss time to relax or spend with family and friends.  I've met others who get so caught up in cleaning or having their house just perfect that they work themselves to the bone.  And it's not completely their fault.  We've been taught that perfect households and a high paying job are what we strive for.  That's just not true.  We all need to stop and take a look a how we spend our time.  What are our priorities?  Are we missing out on things?  I admit that I really need to stop sometimes and prioritize my own life. 

4. When it's all said and done, will you have said more than you've done?

Probably.  Again it's hard for me to take that first step so sometimes I talk a lot but don't act.  Currently I am really trying to reexamine my wants and needs. 

5. What is the one thing you'd most like to change about the world?

Our ability to listen.  Many of the world problems come from misunderstandings or lack of truly listening.  We need to get better at listening to other people when they talk and share instead of just thinking about what we're going to say next.  My prime example of this is American politics.  All I see and hear and read is people (I don't care what side you're on anymore) yelling at the "other side."  We don't listen and try to respond.  We don't listen and understand.  We don't listen and care.  We yell.  And yell louder if it seems like the other side isn't hearing.  Peace starts with listening...