Title: Transformers: Dark of the Moon

Year Released/Rating: 2011 PG-13

Starring: Shia LaBeoug, Rosie Huntington-Whiteley, Josh Duhamel

Directed By: Michael Bay

Written By: Ehren Kruger

Genre: Action, Scifi

Star Rating: 2/5 stars

Where I Got It: Netflix

Trivia:

Megatron's alternate mode in this film is a Mack Titan tanker truck, his first Earth disguise. This was chosen to put him on parallel with Optimus Prime (the filmmakers described him as "a demented version of Prime"). This mode also pays homage to theTransformers: Robots in Disguise Decepticon Scourge (also known in Japan as "Black Convoy"), who is an evil clone of Optimus Prime.
Michael Bay described the tone of the film as "a homeland version of Black Hawk Down with giant alien robots." -- Ridiculous!
When the employee is pushing the buttons on the photocopier that later transforms into Laserbeak, the distinct tones of the copier form the title theme song of The Transformers.
In 2011, Alan Tudyk told "Empire" magazine that his character from 28 Days (the gay German performance artist, Gerhard) was the same character as the one Tudyk later played in this movie: "I decided that it's the same guy: he had gotten out of rehab, got himself on the right track and then... entered the army, became a specialist, found that he had skills in computers and weapons. Then he got burned out after too much killing and just decided to become a valet to Agent Simmons. There's a moment where he just goes crazy, and I say, 'That's the old me' and that was all based on that bullshit idea that it was the same guy." -- The only interesting bit of the trivia!

Summary: The Autobots learn of a Cybertronian spacecraft hidden on the moon, and race against the Decepticons to reach it and to learn its secrets.

Review:

This movie sucks... Can I just end my review there? No, I must explain a bit more. The plot is completely convoluted I had no idea what the movie was actually about for the first hour. Even after that, it had some many logical failings. I couldn't get over it. The characters are flat, well, the human characters at least. Megatron and Optimus Prime are the most realized characters and those are robots. Plus, I am so disappointed that this many awesome actors are in this movie. See: John Malkovich, John Turturro, Frances McDormand, Alan Tudyk, and Ken Jeong. Ugh! We decided to watch this movie tonight for a comedy. And it is definitely hilarious, but in all the bad ways.

Best Bits: Notice they are all from awesome side characters...

Dutch: [after dispatching some Soviets] I'm so sorry. That is the old me.
Simmons: [Wants to impress the Russians with a Russian phrase] Dutch, give me something tough. Dutch: Eh. [browses dictionary in panic] Dutch: Baryshnikov. Cosmonaut Dimitri: We do speak English. Simmons: Dutch, you suck. Dutch: It's a Cyrillic alphabet. It's like all the buttons you never push on a calculator! I don't suck.
Bruce Brazos: Come on people! Yes, a workmate died, but looking out the window is not going to bring him back! The man was depressed. You can keep watching him but he's not getting up, you all read Humpty Dumpty.