Title: Counting the Cost

Author: Jill Duggar

Publisher: Gallery Books 2023

Genre: Romance

Pages: 288

Rating: 3/5 stars

Reading Challenges: 

Jill and Derick knew a normal life wasn’t possible for them. As a star on the popular TLC reality show 19 Kids and Counting, Jill grew up in front of viewers who were fascinated by her family’s way of life. She was the responsible, second daughter of Jim Bob and Michelle’s nineteen kids; always with a baby on her hip and happy to wear the modest ankle-length dresses with throat-high necklines. She didn’t protest the strict model of patriarchy that her family followed, which declares that men are superior, that women are expected to be wives and mothers and are discouraged from attaining a higher education, and that parental authority over their children continues well into adulthood, even once they are married.

But as Jill got older, married Derick, and they embarked on their own lives, the red flags became too obvious to ignore.

For as long as they could, Jill and Derick tried to be obedient family members—they weren’t willing to rock the boat. But now they’re raising a family of their own, and they’re done with the secrets. Thanks to time, tears, therapy, and blessings from God, they have the strength to share their journey. Theirs is a remarkable story of the power of the truth and is a moving example of how to find healing through honesty.

I succumbed to publishing peer pressure and grabbed this one from the library shelves. I ended up pretty disappointed in this read, but wasn’t sure exactly why. Of course, I don’t believe in an higher power, but I don’t think that was my problem. The more I examined my thoughts, I can down to a few aspects that I did not like. The biggest of these is that it feels like Jill has not done enough reflection to see her upbringing clearly. She maintains that her childhood was overall very good. It’s only in the last sections of the book that she questions the authority model for her entire family. But the examination is cursory. I’m not asking her to turn her back on her entire family or faith, but clearly there were a lot of concerning situations and models that she just glosses over. I don’t need details of the abuse she suffered, but she seems to dismiss it throughout most of the book and only brings it up when discussing the financial compensation. Perhaps this book would have more reflection and nuance if it had been written five years in the future. It seems that she is too close to the situation to see clearly right now.

Next up on the TBR pile: